Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Turning Point - UPDATED

Most days are simply continuations of the day before or a subtle lead in to tomorrow. But some days are turning points. Today is one of those days.

Last night, not long after midnight, I finished edits on my new manuscript. A huge psychic weight lifted off off my shoulders. (As any writer knows, it's the next best thing to writing, "The End!") I played a game of Spider Solitaire in celebration, promised myself a Grand Marnier in the near future, and headed up to bed. At 6AM I got back up. I hadn't slept a wink.

I did, however, feel a cold coming on. At first I thought it was allergies, but instead of subsiding, the sneezes, stuffiness, and itchy eyes progressed. I haven't been sick, even with a slight cold, in almost three years.

The day after I got married, I was struck with a high fever. After all the planning and gown buying and reception-hall-picking and as-close-to-perfect-as-possible-wedding-celebrations were over, my body gave in.

That was a turning point. 

And so is this.

I'm adeptly in tune with my body, as I think many people (read: women) are. The slightest ache or weakness is noted and carefully monitored by my inner doctor. Almost always, the ache or perceived rise in temperature passes, and my inner doctor relaxes and reverts to "on call" status. My body is again giving in, but not due to the beginning of a marriage.

My attorney emailed me this morning asking me to sign a document. I clicked on the page and saw, "Affidavit of Consent."

 The marriage of the Plaintiff and Defendant is irretrievably broken. 

October 2010
I will be signing my name on a divorce decree after 27 years of marriage. 

A turning point like few others.

I know what you're thinking: Get plenty of rest and push the fluids.

That's exactly what I plan to do. And, then I'll hold my head high, put one foot in front of the other, and proudly walk forward into my new unimaginable future. 

Laurie (my sister) & Peter's Wedding. 10.01.11 Centennial, CO
(Special thanks to my family, friends, and Bob Shelton for making that future possible.)

EPIPHANY: In regards to this post, a friend of mine wrote on FB: "I always got sick right after nationals. Means you've done great things, lady." She was a talented swimmer in HS. Interesting viewpoint, given it took me an entire year to complete my novel and am now dealing, in a more serious way, with the end of a LTR. Pushing yourself forward through the eye of a life-changing needle is like giving birth. Right now I'm in psychic labor, and the aches, pains, stuffy head, and sore throat are what I must feel to give birth to a new life...mine.

*I love that I found an art gallery to represent this post. Artistic expression, in all its' facets, is one of the things I'm most committed to at this turning point in my life.


Vegas Linda Lou said...

On to a new chapter of life, my friend. Wishing you and your gorgeous legs the best of everything!

Julie said...

You are awesome (yup, I said it again). Congrats on finishing the novel, and remember, the best thing about being sick is taking time to cuddle with a kitty.

Love ya!

Anonymous said...

Hey friend.
Keep on keeping on.

keith H

Anonymous said...

As a writer I'm sure you're aware that, just like a book, the best part of life is often simply turning the page.

And from someone who knew you way back when, you're much hotter now than you were. And you were smokin' back in the day, kid!

Push the fluids. Yes. Especially the Gran Marnier.


Debra Lynn Lazar said...

Linda, You always know how to make a gal feel good! And, best of everything to you in your "new life," my friend. xoxo

Debra Lynn Lazar said...

Julie, Yes, baby Mia is making sure she's on top of things. And by "things" I mean my desk. BTW, you're pretty awesome yourself, girlfriend. ;-)

Debra Lynn Lazar said...

Keith, I'm going, I'm going! Looking forward to dinner next Tues.

Debra Lynn Lazar said...

Tom, You were and always will be a sweetheart. Thanks so much for being in my life for oh so many years... ;-)

Julie said...

Your future will be very bright. :) I look forward to reading during your new chapter! Good luck and feel better!

Debra Lynn Lazar said...

Julie, Thank you so much for your kind words. Much appreciated. ;-)

Karen Walker said...

Debra, sending you virtual hugs and good thoughts. It must be excruciating to finalize the end of a 27-year-marriage, but you have put one foot in front of the other, letting go and moving on, and and I know you are making a brand new, wonderful life for yourself. Many blessings,

Debra Lynn Lazar said...

Karen, Your words always touch me deeply. Thank you for your ongoing support and inspiration.

Angie Ledbetter said...

Turn the page, close the book, blow your nose, and get busy! Hugs for a happy, fulfilling journey.

Debra Lynn Lazar said...

Angie, Your way with words is epic. (((hugs)))

Leanne Hunt said...

This is an inspirational post. Thanks for sharing. Even though we as writers invest ourselves heavily in our work, true life drama, when it is honestly told, is the most enthralling.

Debra Lynn Lazar said...

Leanne, What a wonderful comment. Thank you so much. It's hard to know "how much to tell," but I've always been committed to being honest on my blog. Inspiring others is the least I can do for all the inspiration I receive from so many.

Laura Marcella said...

Yup, this happens to me too. I remember the day after I graduated college (which was also six weeks before my wedding) I got so so sick and slept through two entire days. Then on the third day I woke up and felt like a brand new woman. It's your body's way of telling you to slow down and get some rest so you can continue to do all the amazing things that are in your future!

Hope you feel 100% better soon and wishing you all the best, Debra!!

Debra Lynn Lazar said...

Laura, Thank you, my dear. It's fun hearing how others experience similar things. ;-)

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