Thursday, March 19, 2009

When I Grow Up I Want to Be...

Chelsea Handler! She's gorgeous, blonde-haired, hilarious, and Jewish. I had the pleasure of seeing her and my other favorite comic Lewis Black live and "in concert" within the last two weeks.

I saw Chelsea, my comic idol, (and, yes, we're on a first-name basis) at the Tower Theater in Philly on March 7th and last Friday the 13th I saw the always angry, always ingenious Lewis Black at my favorite venue - The Music Box - at the Borgata in Atlantic City.

Chelsea is half Jewish and half Mormon. Need I say more? Yes, of course I do. She's a Jersey girl who was raised Jewish, has her own talk show on E at 11PM EST (watch it!!) and is the author of two of the funniest books ever written: "My Horizontal Life" a memoir of her one-night stands and "Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea" another hilarious memoir. (Her personal beverage favorite? Grey Goose.)

Lewis Black is also Jewish - I can't help it if the Jews have the market on funny. When your people have been persecuted and made fun of for having big noses for thousands of years, you either become depressed and withdrawn, get a nose job, or make jokes. Some of us do all three. Anyway, Lewis Black is an angry man. He doesn't understand Democrats or Republicans or why anyone would want to drink soy "milk." (Actually, there's no such thing as soy milk, but you'd have to ask Lewis about that.)

Since I'd be willing to bet my green-flowered thong (for those of you who hadn't guessed what clothing item I was referring to in my last post) that some of you don't know who one or both of these comic geniuses are, I thought I'd introduce you. ..

Ladies and gentlemen, Chelsea Handler and Lewis Black! (cue wild cheering and the San Diego Marching Band playing "Tusk!")

You can thank me for the following video clips in the comments section. Enjoy!

Chelsea Plans Her Funeral

Lewis Black Talks about a Nuclear Holocaust

28 comments:

Angie Ledbetter said...

Handler & Black better watch out. I bet neither of them coulda come up with the band playing Tusk line. Made me laugh out loud! Gonna check out those links, but if you like 'em, I'm sure I will too, being sorta similarly warped myself. :)

PS I miss Don Rickles.

DebraLSchubert said...

Angie, I hope you love them both. Please come back and let me know what you think!

Vegas Linda Lou said...

Half Jewish and half Mormon? How the hell does that happen? I want to party with her--ha!

DebraLSchubert said...

Linda, Not too easily! She would be a blast to party with, except you couldn't drink anything because you'd be too busy laughing! Have you deleted crazy guy on your blog yet?

Chuck Schubert said...

Hilarious!! Laughter is the best medicine known to man and these two are masters at the game. Love it!

DebraLSchubert said...

Chuck, I love you, too.

Joanne said...

There was a lot of buzz about "Are You There Vodka" but I haven't read it. I love memoir and am always on the lookout for intriguing stories. I'll put this one on my list!

DebraLSchubert said...

Joanne, It's a fun, quick read. She is SO talented. If I write one sentence in my life that's half as funny as anything she's written I'll be happy and fulfilled. If you want a good laugh, watch the clips.

Jamie Mason said...

I love Lewis Black. He's one of my all-time favorites. He did a bit about candy corn that left me in tears.

I've only heard a little of Chelsea Handler, but she makes me laugh. I haven't read a comic's book in ages. I should check it out.

DebraLSchubert said...

Jamie, Lewis Black is a true comic genius. When you see him live you're laughing so hard that you miss half the show!

Broke But Still Drinking said...

They're funny, but they're no Pee Wee Herman.

DebraLSchubert said...

BBSD, True, but who could compete with that level of comedic perfection? Maybe Carrot Top, but that's about it.

Kasie West said...

I knew who chelsea was, did not know lewis. Thanks for the introductions. I love to laugh so comics are among my favorite people.

DebraLSchubert said...

Kasie, I agree - laughter is one of the greatest joys on earth. I'm glad you enjoyed the introduction to Lewis Black. I'm sure his poor mother had her work cut out for her! (Oy, vey!)

giddymomof6 said...

Heheheh! Okay, Chelsea is HILARIOUS! That was SOOO super funny! And he was good, but i loved chelsea. Thanks for the introductions! Jenni

DebraLSchubert said...

Jenni, I know. She's hilarious. I can't get enough of her. I'm glad you enjoyed the clip.

Note to Chelsea: You've got a new fan. Her name's Jenni. You're welcome.

Julie said...

Good morning! Just checking in and getting caught up on my blog reading! Happy Saturday!

I love, love, love Lewis Black! I've seen him live and he is just hysterical.

DebraLSchubert said...

Julie, Good morning! I know, he's a complete riot. I had tears rolling down my face last Friday night. He's got some of his shows on video and they're well worth renting and/or owning.

valbrussell said...

I had no idea you were a closet comedy fan! These two are indeed very funny. :)

DebraLSchubert said...

Val, My name is Debbie and I'm a comedy-holic. I'm not really in the closet about it - I'm a comedy junkie with links to Chelsea and Lewis on my sidebar. Most of the movies I see are comedies and a lot of the books I read. (Although not all - I'm also a True Crime freak - go figure!!) I'm glad you enjoy Chelsea and Lewis - bringing laughter to the world is a noble pursuit.

Debbie said...

Chelsea is one of our faves in our house too! I love her. My husband loves her. And even better - he says I remind him of her. Not the looks or religion - the sarcasm:)

DebraLSchubert said...

Debbie, That's quite a compliment from your husband! In addition to her comedy, I also love her politics. She was a huge Obama supporter and wasn't afraid to show it. Like I said, when I grow up...

Rebecca Anne said...

I've watched her show several times and love her sense of humor. I didn't even realize she had books out there so I'm adding them to purchase list. Thank you!
Ok, I'm off to check out the links.
Rebecca

DebraLSchubert said...

Rebecca Anne, You MUST read her books. I know I'm sounding redundant, but they're comic genius. I hope you enjoyed the clips!

Kelly said...

Love, love, love Chelsea Handler! I enjoyed her book and watch her show a few times a week. She is so blunt and funny! I even entered to try and win a place on her round table (some dude won :(

DebraLSchubert said...

Kelly, First of all, thanks for stopping by. Secondly, OMG - so did I! ("auditioned" for the round table!) My video tape was probably the worst one she saw. I could picture Chelsea, Chuy and Heather Long Boobs laughing at my thoroughly lame attempt. It was fun, though, and it got me to step WAY out of my comfort zone to make the video, which is always a good thing.

Kelly said...

Ha! Heather Long Boobs!
My nine year old son taped my audition for me....so I kept the audition PG rated!
I am a loyal follower of yours as well now! :)

DebraLSchubert said...

Kelly, Welcome to my wacky world! My audition was pretty much PG, with a pinch of R thrown in for good measure. I'd recently met Paul Stanley (of KISS) and he has one of the nicest asses I've ever seen. (seriously amazing) I mentioned to Chelsea that she might want to do a segment called, "Guess the Celebrity's Ass" where they would just show a rear view and have people guess whose ass it was. I think this would be pretty damn funny and right up her alley!

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