Monday, January 19, 2009

Would You Like Some Cheese with Your Whine?

Whine and Cheese
I'm sorry, I'm going to be doing some 'splaining here, Lucy. Not EXplaining, COMplaining. Of course, I have no business complaining at all. After all, Dusty's home, mom's doing GREAT (thanks again for your magical good wishes), I'm warm, pampered, well fed and dry. Too bad about the Eagles, but I'm really a Jets and Broncos fan anyway, so I won't pretend to care. Plus, I've got way more important things to compain about...

Would somebody please step up to the plate and finish my editing for me? Thanks. I owe you.
OK, I admit it, I'm starting to be a big pain in my a**. Usually others hold that esteemed place of honor (husband? kids? woman on express lane at Target with more than 10 items?) but now I'm filling it all by myself. My wonderful copy editor suggested I resuscitate some of the "dead babies" I've relocated to my Outtakes file. Damn her. She's right, again, which just means more work for poor, little, 'ole me. The good thing is the roller coaster ride that my word count is on will, once again, be barrelling upward. The bad thing is, or maybe I already mentioned this, more work for poor, little, 'ole me. (Do you feel sorry for me yet? No? OK, how about this:)

Babysitting over 40 - Good Idea or Reason for Drinking Poison? You Decide.
Chuck and I babysat for my cousins this weekend, girls, aged 7 & 4. (They left one hour and twelve minutes ago, but who's counting?) My kids are boys aged 19 & 17. There's a teeny weeny little difference in energy levels between 17 and 4. Seventeen? "I'm spending the night at Andrew's. See you tomorrow." Four? "Weee! Watch me run around in circles until I'm so dizzy I fall down and then I'll chase the cats around the house and then I'll jump on the bed and then I'll watch a video and can I have some water? Cereal? Pop Tarts? Cake? Weeeee! Let's watch Hamster on a Piano on You Tube fifty more times! Weeeee!" Can you say exhausted?

I made Adam and Ethan promise they'd NEVER have kids as long as I'm alive. My mother was shocked when I told her this. "Debbie," she said, "you're AMAZING with kids!"
"Was amazing, mom, was."

It's true. I used to love little kids. I was the poster child for "Woman Holding Baby and Loving It." That woman, I'm afraid, is dead and buried. Not that I don't love my cousins, don't get me wrong. They're the cutest things you'll ever see, talented, brilliant, filled with unending curiosity (and did I mention, energy?) and could beat my sorry a** in a spelling bee any day of the week. However, what few kilowatts I have in this ever-aging body I need to store away for my writing. Why can't they understand that?

MLK and GWB - Two Sets of Initials that Should Never Be Used in the Same Sentence
First of all, God bless Martin Luther King, Jr., may he rest in peace. And, secondly, we must be doing something right because in less than 24 hours we'll have a president with a brain bigger than an acorn and compassion for something other than his own personal bank account. Thank God this eight-year long frat party is over!

How was/is your weekend and how do you feel about the upcoming inauguration?


Anonymous said...

Ha! Ha! Ha! I can't stop laughing at your post, and I mean that in the nicest way! First, the girls are ages 7 & 4, which only partly explains their energy level. Second, there's a reason I never give them Chocolate & Strawbery frosted poptarts for breakfast. I'd never survive the day otherwise. And third, to really milk all the energy out, Stella has now finished one gymnastics class, is currently ice skating with her sister & will be swimming for 30 minutes nonstop this evening in swim lessons. That will allow her to sleep peacefully tonight. Why do you think we jumped at the chance for a weekend alone?! Thanks again guys! In case you had any regrets about not having more kids, they should be good birth control.


DebraLSchubert said...

Tam, OMG! My brain is totally fried. I corrected their ages. I'm glad you appreciate my humor. According to Dr. Chuck, sugar doesn't make kids hyper. Who knows. I think some people just have more energy than others, especially people under the age of five! Stella and Sophie are beyond awesome. Thanks for sharing them with us.

WendyCinNYC said...

I think *everything* makes a four-year-old hyper!

Angie Ledbetter said...

Totally feel ya on the editing/revision stuffs!

DebraLSchubert said...

Wendy, A truer sentence has never been spoken!

Angie - So, are you offering to step up to the plate? ;)

Elizabeth said...

ya, I'm with you. I'm getting closer to 40 and don't like kids much anymore. I'll suffer through my own as they are little still, but NEVER again!!!
They are lucky they are so cute.

Big Plain V said...

I have an idea that will benefit both of us. You can take the 100 pages I had to cut from my manuscript and splice them into yours.

And they all lived happily ever after.

DebraLSchubert said...

Elizabeth, I've always said, if people came into the world at say, the age of 2, the human race would have died off long ago. I have no doubt your kids are WAY cute!

Ray - I like a man who can think on his toes. I'm sure your sci-fi YA (is that at all right?) will fit right in with my, dare I say it, chick lit!!! (There. I said it.)

Devon Ellington said...

No sympathy from me on the edits -- sounds like you have a great relationship with your editor and that you're shaping the book into the best it can be. The process is a pain sometimes, but the result is worth it.

Loved your post on initials -- and I completely agree!

Erin said...

I think *everything* makes a four-year-old hyper!

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